a minha narrativa ilusória e porquês

4 o que são más intenções
5 o que é saudade
6 o que é perda
7 onde é que eu acabo e os outros começam
8 do que é que eu sou capaz
9 o que é que eu quero para mim
10 omnipotência sobre tudo o que realmente desejo
11 quais são os limites da minha creatividade
12 qual é o limite do meu sofrimento
13 porque é que sou tão sensível ao sofrimento colectivo
14 porque é que eu sinto tanta dor enquanto que a minha vida não tem problemas, não mereço sentir-me mal nem quero sentir-me mal
15 como é que exilo as minhas emoções
16 como é que eu lido com a dor
17 o que é intimidade, e o que é amar
18 quem é que eu sou
19 quem é que eu quero ser
20 porque é que eu sou o que sou, como é que crio o que quero ser
21 como é que eu amo
22 como é que eu volto a sentir algo
23 como é que eu saio daqui e me despeço de mim
24 qual é a importância dos outros, e a morte do ego

rant on reality

All is mind. Nothing excites mine more than pondering its limits and influence and imagining ways of unifying the abstract and concrete. Some may call a model such as this God, I call it a Theory of Everything.

We perceive reality differently than others. The senses are the same but we grasp the same things differently. Every individual has its own reality, tinted by their own perceptions and expectations. We are our thoughts. Thoughts become things. We can adjust our thoughts to modify and create the reality we desire. The world is a mental creation. Or so they say.

Empirical science is based on the immutable, fixed “qualities” of the concrete world, more specifically, the mental creations we all agree on (so far*). Through experimentation and observation, we can all experience and verify through the senses and replicate everything that science has backed up so far. They are immutable because the value of a certain quality doesn’t differ from individual to individual. It always remains the same, therefore it can be experienced and agreed on equally by everyone, and reproduced.

An example of a “quality” that is mutable yet also taken very seriously in science although it isn’t considered one, is the realm of ethics and psychology. Principles like “All is Mind” are being used extensively in mechanisms of “thought reform” such as cognitive behavioural therapy. I’ve always wondered how the bridge between material and immaterial, thoughts and reality would be expressed. And why they are given different weights of credibility. Is there any relationship between the two, if so, why aren't we more focused on proving so? How could we even begin about doing so?

Does our mind, besides mere observation, have any impact on the physical properties of reality? Where does that influence begin and end?

See observer effect. 1, 2, 3, 4

I said so far(*) because we can only guarantee the reproducibility of everything we’ve known... so far. From the moment there is an exception to the “earthly laws”, everything must be reconsidered and adjusted. So is there really an immutability to it all? We may never know.

For example, if we ever come across a planet where gravity doesn’t follow the formula we’re so used to know, if there’s something out there that is extremely different than everything we know because it is taking into account other variables we don’t know yet, we would have to rethink everything we take for granted, everything we consider true hard fact-based science.

Far out example: If there’s life out there that can sustain itself without oxygen, and or eg., isn’t carbon based, but maybe on this atmosphere wouldn’t work, we would have to rethink everything we know about organic chemistry and what actually makes life possible.

See space-time. 1 2, 3, 4

My current idea is that maybe there are a lot of variables that we do not know yet, that could actually explain and complete a lot of empirical theories. Including the more theoretical ones such as consciousness.

Or maybe the chaos, rhythm and dynamicity of the universe would make it impossible to predict everything – would we need to discard and reconsider all these variables again? No, because the dynamic nature of the universe in itself would be just another variable.

So is the universe ultimately deterministic? Ultimately yes, it does seem so.

What I’m more interested in now is where does consciousness fit into the Theory of Everything. What is the ultimate model that unifies cognition, intelligence, awareness, will, emotions, intuition and a bag of flesh, and what is that about?

What kind of variables exist to express consciousness and what do they mean?

Is the idea of a deterministic world, and are these variables just a mental creation too, and are we biased by our earthly senses, and ultimately, our own individual expectations?

Are my senses ultimately fooling me and the world isn’t actually how I think it makes sense?

What about what is making collective sense? Are we all just smashing bias together and trying to forcingly create meaning and conclusions out of it all, and/or progressively adjusting it so we can have a referential Manual of Life which we call science?

The anticipation will literally kill me.